Sep 27, 2011

Jotu on the Show: Chat with Shradz

Navjot Singh Gang Rants

Today we bring you the first and exclusive episode of Chat With Shradz. Shradz whom we also know as MissShaitaan on Twitter is a highly talented anchor from Mumbai and she will be doing this show exclusively for GOGang. In the first episode, the guest of honor is Jotu. This is a two part episode and was shot on September 25 and 26th respectively. After all the post production work and edits, here is the episode uncensored for you.

Note: Things mentioned in closed square brackets [] were never said. They are my comments about the interview.
      Some edits have been made to keep the flow of interview intact though the fun flavor has been preserved to the maximum.
Episode Number 1 [Date of Shooting: September 25, 2011 9:22 PM IST]
Shraddha Bansode
Okay, so let's start..  
"Taaliyon se swaagat karein hamare aajke guest ko, Mr.Navjot
Singh..also known as your Paajjiiii   "
(applause)
So, Paaji how do you feel tonight?  

Jotu
Rofl..Feel like I am at Koffee with Shraddha  	

S:
Hahahaha, this is chat with Shraddha. B-)

J:
Feeling..gr8 and awsm to be interviewed by great beautiful intelligent
and smart miss shradhu  

S:
Oh my God, I am so flattered    ^_^
(looks at the camera)   [Puri DramaQueen hai.   ]
Okay, so are you ready for
the interview?
Kuch raaz kholne ko taiyyaaar ho?  
(silence)

J:
Yepp

S:
Okay, so..

J:
Raaz... *Will see u after the interview* 

S:  
Uhmm first round is easy..   so u can be relaxed  

J:
Ab kar bhi de shuru meri maa  

S:
Inshort, questions are boring in the first round. Hahahhaa.  
*laughs at her own joke* [PJ Queen as well]

J:  

S:
So, What was your favorite pass time when you were a teenager?  

J:
Take back the intelligent waala compliment  

S:
*revengeful eyes, but a fake smile* [See see...what she is doing]
Dasso paaji ..  

J:
Watching TV  
Could be anything
Like even used to watch Saas bahu bakwaas  

S:
Hahahhaa. Lol! Really?  

J:
Haha..yaa at one point of time yes  

S:
Hmmmmm.. So Paaji's favourite must be Tulsi and Paarvati!   [Epic facepalm moment, shit shouldn't have said that]

J:
used to  
Rofl.. [Laughing at my own sillyness. Dumb Hoon main. ]

S:
Aur wait did you like Ba?
Hahaha. Jokes apart.   This was a weird pass time. Saas bahu!  
Hahaha.   [Kill me now please]

J:
Haha..

S:
Next question,

J:
okiiee
*takes out popcorn*   [This is what happens when you are not allowed to have dinner and have to attend interviews at odd time of night. I will murder the channel waala guys.]

S:
What is the naughtiest thing you have ever done?  
We want this to be real  

S:
*grabs your bowl of popcorn* [MissShaitaan at work..as usual.]

J:  
I hate u

S:
Well, I know.   I needa answer.
Naughtiest thing.  

J:
Naughtiest...can't remember....grr..I was a shareef bachcha  

S:
I know there are many, and you are just thinking.. kaunsabataun  
Sach batao?  
I am not asking this during a particular time. Aajtak kabhi bhi.  
Kal bhi ho sakta hai   [Kal? :O Dimaag satak gaya iska]

J:
Haha once we fooled our arts teacher  

S:
Naughtiest thing.  
Haha, how?  
Would you share
?

J:
like..Actually wasn't my alone ka job  

S:
Group?   Wow, I love such stories.

J:
yaa  

S:
Kya kiya tha teacher ke saath   ?
*naughty expression* [Jaw drops..what did she meant by this? Aajkal ke bachche..My God.]

J:
Actually..she had given us smthing to draw
and asked the next day
ki sab bana ke laayenge
bt...nobody had much interest in it..especially us boys  

S:
Yah you boys.

J:
so...nobody made

S:  

J:
rofl
nw...we got smone else's file
And the first bencher showed it to teacher saying ki this is mine  
guess what...when she came to it...he passed his to mine
and i showed the same one
rofl...
and the whole row kept showing the same file to her  

S:   Hahaha.. And she didn't even realize?  

J:
By the time she reached the second last one..she did  
and then whole row was outside the class  

S:
Lol..    Naughty baccha log she must be saying..  
*passes you the popcorn* [Had to beg her to pass them.]

J:
Rofl..
none of us bothered

S:
Haha this was crazy Pawwji!!  

J:
ki what she was saying  

S:
Hahaha nicee   notty lil boys!
Okay, so next question!:)

J:
Though I was shareef..bt my class was very naughty..there r dozens of
instances when i was in xi class...well for sm other time
haha
okay
waits  

S:
*interview ke baad milna*  
Uhm yeah
the next question  

J:
okiee

S:
Most embarassing childhood story!?  

J:
*eats and pass u back sm popcorn*  

S:
*looks in the empty bowl of popcorn* [Isko half filled bowl empty lag raha hai? :O Bhukkad kahin ki]
Bhukkad  
Dasso! Answer dasso  

J:
When I was caught cheating...and teacher complained to my mom..and
my mom was a teacher in the same school  
That was my first attempt at cheating
during weekly tests  
rofl

S:
How were you caught?  

J:
Haha...had a book under my desk  
Teacher was roaming..around

S:
HAWWWW.  

J:
and suddenly she spotted smthing beneath my desk

S:
*tch tch tch..nods in disappointment*  

J:
she shouted frm across the class
navjot..neeche kya hai?
and Mera face white  
rofl

S:
Lol.. bwahahahahaha  
Acha hua!!  
You deserved it   cheater kahike

J:
Haha..guess what..I was caught in the same manner in college    

S:  

J:
And examiner kept my book for the whole exam
was during college's practical exams
rofl

S:
Areyy ma kasam  

J:
thankfully..got at the end of the exam..and no punishment  

S:
Yeh toh nainsaafii hai bhaaaai  

J:
That day I learnt..I don't know how to cheat in exams    

S:
Very good.   Next question

J:
Okaay  

S:
This round is gonna be a lil tough  
First question!  
Ready!?

J:
Ready    

S:
Which are the first 3 words which come in your brain when you think of
Sounak?  
Why?  

J:
Crazy....best..and Buddhu  
I guess I don't have to answer for crazy and best
bt buddu...well woh bhi u can understand...dunno why he had to leave  
and contact bhi nahin karta    

S:
Bas itna hi..   agar woh iss wakt
hamara tv
show dekh rahe hoge
toh koi message?   

J:
Whereever u r ...be happy and all the best for ur life  
And don't forget us  

S:
aur?

S:  

J:
Ok..last line is stupid  
Aur..teri khair nahin..jab aayega waapis

S:
Very.  

J:
*Evil*  

S:
Kyyunn kya karoge?  

J:
Jab aayega tab sochenge  
dhamki toh de doon pehle
haha

S:  
heheheee
Ok nicely answeered..  
Next question?

J:
Group pitai  
Umm...dinner aa raha hai...ok continue  

S:  
Did you ever feel like running away from your house? Honest answer
please.

S:
Bhukkad

J:  
Bhook toh sabko lagti hai  

S:
Dasso..  

J:
Yes...and not once..bt couple of times
i felt like running away from my house

S:
Oh why so?   can we know!  *

J:
Bas can say..when I felt alone...there were times when I had nobody to
go to
nobody to talk to about my sorrows
then i really felt like running away
happened during my college life...which sucked for me  

S:
Agli baar jab ho toh flight pakad pe mere ghar aa jaana   hehehehe [At times when she says sweet things like this, I think chal yaar itni buri bhi nahin hai. Ok..smtimes she can be sweet. Only smtimes.   ]

J:
Aww...Pakka  

S:
hehe next question?

J:
Sure..

S:
What's your weakest point?  

J:
My weakest point..is that i think everyone in the world is a good person
and can be trusted

S:
ppl like me  

J:
I never consider anyone as bad...unless they do something bad to me or my family  
Haha..

S:
Heyy thats a nice thing you believe in:)

J:
Not exactly.should always remain on alert with new people
is better
bt am a person who can be fooled easily  

S:
umm why do you think so?

J:
think what?
that one should be alert or that i can be fooled?  

S:
You can be fooled.
why do you think so?

J:
Coz I have been  
experience  

S:
Achaaaaa...aisa hai kya!!  
*asks for more popcorn and some cold drinks*   [Bhukkad Alert]

J:
Haha yepp

S:
next question is interesting..  
wanna know?

J:
*Passes large tub + large coke*  
Yaa..jaldi  

S:
*takes happily*
we would love to discover your romantic side.. if you had to propose the
lady you love.. tell us your idea how would u do it?  
this has to be too romantic for u B-)

S:
*rubs palms* [Shaitaan..dekh loonga kisi din tujhe.]  

J:
Haha...Yaa...I am a romantic at heart  
Umm...dunno what I will do...will have to be something that cms from my
heart..and probably also something that will make her feel the most
special person in the world

S:
Aww..  
and any ideas you have?   Tell our viewers, they may use it  
*winks at the camera* 

J:
And has to be something spontaneous..
if i have to think too much..it won't be that romantic
probably will know when i will have that someone in my life
Until then...I am pretty much clueless...yaa bt probably will take sm inspiration from a mvie 

S:   Copy cat.
Khud kii bhi koi idea rakho!
Soo that clearly means you are waiting for someone special
to come in your life, eh!?
Interesting.  

J:
Yep..
I am waiting  

S:
Shaadi ki matlab koi planning nahi hai.  
*damn*
Fukkat ka khaana khaane ka chance nahi aa raha   [Bhukkad Alert]

J:
Haha..shaadi ki planning actually kabhi kabhi karta hoon

S:
CONFESSSSSSION.  
That's a CONFESSSION.  

J:
infact y'day was talking to smone in length abt my marriage planning
rofl
bt gal not available  

S:
Whoo who whoo?  
Soo, that means you keep thinking about the marriage thingy haan?  
Haaan?

J:
Who kaun?

S:
With whom were you talking about your marriage?   [Grr..Bahut bigad gayi hai yeh.]

J:
Haha...arey hai ek friend  
Don't do 2+2 here

S:   Theek hai. Won't get into that.

J:
okay?  

S:
Ok. Ok.  
You have did the second round very nicely.  

J:
Ok..Yes the friend was a she..not he..bt that's all  

S:
Here's your hamper  

J:
Yayy  

S:
*passes you a pencil* [All compliments which I gave her, I want them back now.]

J:  

S:  
You can write important things with it.  

S:
*applause from the audience*

J:
I have a pen on my desk right nw  
Chup karo saalon..no taali

S:
*audience darr gayi*  

J:
Ek 2 rs ki pencil hi di hai is kanjoos ne

S:
Sharpner bhi le lo.   [Paaji se panga? :O Bhaari padega bachchu.]

J:  

S:
Koi kami nahi hai.  
3rd round wil be tough. SO you better have your dinner before it.  

J:
Haha..okay
Thanku...was feeling all drained out
after a long tiring interview  
And I want a bada waala hamper..
not this 2 rs ki pencil type gift
okay?

S:   Sure.

J:
Haha..
chal..cyaa  

S:
we'll make arragements for some rulers   [Ab toh tu gayi.  ]

J:
Take care..good night  

S:
erasers. etc  

J:
I hate you

S:
Goodnight.

J:  

S:
3rd round baadmein.   Tab batana yeh!  

J:
Haha..okay

S:
*break*

Episode Number 2 [Date of Shooting: September 26, 2011 9:17 PM IST]

S:
*break over*
*applause*
Guys aapka swaagat hai break ke baad.. though
sorry toh*  
toh hamare saath aaj hai
Mr. Navjot Singh..
aur yeh hamare 3rd round par hai..Jo ki
Finall round hai..  
Toh Navjott jee kya aap iss round ke liye ready ho?

J:
Ji haan  
Bilkul..I am ready

S:
Toh chaliye..  

J:
*A lil bit scared from inside* 

S:
Okay, in this round Paaji I will ask you one question and give you
options.   So won't be difficult for you to think.
*winks*
Chalega na? Koi problem toh nai?

J:
Daudega  
No problems

S:
Wokay toh lagta hai
aap ekdum prepared hogaye ho break mein  
Chalo
If you were to choose one, who would you choose.. 1.Vinay 2.Yamini
3.Satya
*asks for some makeup*

J:
Yamini

S:
We want reasons also.. 

J:  

S:
Itni aasaani se nahi chodne waale.. *laughs*

J:
I will give reason of why not the other 2  

S:
Hahahaha okay woh bhi chalega..
Bataiye!

J:
Btw..srry to clarify..choose for?  

S:
choose in general paaji..
Kya aap bhi.  

J:
Hmm...okay
Vinay nahin..coz i have never seen him serious..difficult to handle  

S:
*laughs* acha acha..
Vinay dekh rahe ho na?  

J:
Satya isliye nahin..coz dunno..i feared..ki mera uspe gussa na nikal
jaaye....we have a love hate relationship  
where..i always end up scolding him and feel bad later  
Isliye not chosen  

S:
Aww..   Good reasons!
So, it is YAMINI then!!
Yamini darlingg.. Our Paajii chose you!..  

J:  
:@ :@

S:
*you get a box of chocolates (empty)* [Grr..]  

J:
Dekh loonga tujhe

S:
Okay!  

J:
*Throws back at u* [Can't even imagine how much satisfaction I felt after doing this.   ]

S:
So fir agla question!
*shocks and surprises*
*acts normal coz the camera is on* [DramaQueen Alert]
(baadmein dekhti hoon isko*  
Haan toh question is..

J:
Rofl..haha

S:
If you had to go on a date with one of these, with whom would you go..
1. Yamini 2. Poonam 3. Kripa ..

S:
an interesting question guys..   [God..Phir phasa diya]
taaliyan ho jaaye..  
*applaud from the audience*
Paaji itna bhi na socho..  

J:
Yamini again    
Actually didn't have to think on this [Yaayy..Bach gaya.   ]  

S:
Ahan! Yamini yamini..
Wow wow girll ..luckier u get today!
Reason Paaji?  

J:
Tu yamini ki jagah kisi ko bhi rakhti..would have gone with her  

S:
Hahaha, aisa kyun?  

J:
She is not lucky..u r giving such options ki she becomes the default
choice  

S:
Koi khaas reason?

J:
Reasons r for other 2 options again  

S:
Okay, dasso!  

J:
Punam isliye nahin..coz she is too young...plus she lives in
US..expensive date...and an awkard one too  

J:  
Kripa isliye nahin...coz I am scared of her    

S:
*laughs very much*
Hehehehe yeh toh interesting

S:
ho gaya jee..  
ek US waali, aur dusri se darr  

S:
Yeh badii funny waali baat hogayi..  
Hahaha, chalo
next question..It's gonna get tough now.  

J:
Kahan chalo? #pj  

S:
READY?

J:
Yaa..

S:
*:| expression*  
Okay!
toh..

S:
Who do you think is more cute?
1.Ridz 2. Shradz 3.Aditi 

S:
*claps herself* [DramaQueen Alert..Alert..Alert]
*excited audience*
and please honest waale answers  

J:
2 Shradz..and before u start thinking highly of urself..I have again got reasons for this one
Reasons for not chosing the other 2    

S:
Uhm.
I want reasons for choosing this beautiful girl Shradz.  
Not for not choosing the other two, or maybe I want.  
My competitors  

J:
Pehle unke reasons sunne padenge..if u want reason for chosing u  
Okay?

S:
*looks at the camera* "sorry ridz and aditi*
Boliye..  

J:
Warna I won't give reason for anyone  

S:
Dasso paaji dasso.  

J:
Haha...aditi isliye nahin..coz she throws shoes and socks at me  
No way she is cute

S:
*in the mind* (aaj toh mere char chaand lag gaye..haaye) [Bekaar mein khush ho rahi hai...haha]

J:  
*Abhi dikhata hoon tujhe*   [Sweet Revenge.]

S:
Haw...Aditi dear heard that?  

J:
She knows that  
and will accept it too
besharam hai woh

S:
Ridz ka reason batao..
*haaye rabba*

J:
Haha...she is more stupid than cute... 

S:
And Ridz?

J:
First thought cms is stupid..ridz rather than cute..plus once i said in
joke..ki she is..toh she literally fought saying ki she is not  

S:
*waves to Ridz* [Ridz..please don't see here.  ]

J:
stupid waala ridz ka hi tha  
forgot to mention

S:
Oh, so Ridz is stupid you mean? *haww waala expression*

J:
so since then I accepted...or shd i say she herself also did..ki she is not

S:  

J:
Yep..  

S:
And why did you choose cutey pie Shradz? ^_^ [DramaQueen Alert]
"my favorite you know"

J:
Coz I was not left with any other options   By default tu hi bachi thi  
Had u kept any other..toh woh kar leta  

S:
*interview ke baad milna, face ka structure badal doongi* [Loved when she made that face.   Revenge is taken]
*fake smile*
Oh hahahaha.. so nice of you.

J:  

S:
Thankyou haan thankyou soo much.

J:
*Thinks..in mind..u r born cute..ssshh   * [Lie]

S:
*inside gusse mein*  
Next puchu? yeh aap paani pina chahogey?  
Ramu paani laana please..  

J:
Nope..pucho direct  

S:
Ramu paani pilo [Grr.yeh nahin sudhregi. ]  

J:  

S:
Waste nahi hona chahiye na ..   [Drama]

J:
*Holi pe baalti paani udaati hai and nw thinking abt a glass...grr  *

S:
Hmm, who's the most close to you?
1.Sounak 2.Shradz 3.Kripa 4.Ridz 5.Kripa 

S:  

J:
Why is one option repeated twice?  
Question galat hai
Change it

S:
It can be repeated.  
Sorry.  
My mistake.

J:
Grr :@

S:
I mean not mind yeh script writers  
uff..
Ramu dusri script..  
Yah options, 1.Sounak 2.Shradz 3.Kripa 4.Ridz

J:
*Ramu kal chutti pe kyun tha?*

S:
Ramu ka birthday tha  
Aap answer do!
With specified reasons..   

J:
Okay..happy belated b'day ramu

S:
*ramu gives a cheesy smile* [Actually she is ramu. For those who don't know.  ]

J:
Answer..is Sounak  

S:   Kyun?
Sounak jeee.. Closest haan  
ab reason sunn naa  
bataiye  

J:
Umm...coz he was the only one who could read me..
without me saying anything..
He could always sense when I was upset...and scolded me if i don't tell

S:
*touchy background music*

J:
I have told him pretty mch everything...I wouldn't have others

S:
Aww..

J:
obviously out of these 4..he was the closest  

S:
*applause*
(some audience have tears in their eyes)  

J:
*Wipes my own eyes and nose*  

S:
*passes you tissue*

J:
*And gives tissues to shradz too..coz she is also crying*

S:
aap toh emotional ho gaye yaar B-|

S:
(oh mujhe rona hai? oops) *starts crying* [DramaQueen...Rofl]  
Toh Paaji, the interview is over.

J:
And that made me laugh...can't stop nw rofl
srry

S:   er, woh main bhul gayi thi rona tha yeh sad song ke baad..

J:
Loved the show...and was such fun talking to you  
Enjoyed it very much...  

S:
Awww ^_^ sab yehi kehte hai.. (ab toh kamine log salary badha do)  
Thankyou Paaaawwji for giving your precious time to us.. (aur kya tha)
haan and being soo kind with me..(maalum hai bohot kind hai ..hummmph)  

J:
*Bribes under the table*  
Your welcome  

S:
*Anna Hazare walks in* [Who called him?   ]
ANNAAAAA  

J:
:@
Damn

S:
Our next guest!  
Paaji aap jao.  
*ANNA looks under the table*

J:
Okiee.

S:
Anna: PAAAAAAAAJIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII  
*all a mess and we end the interview*

J:
*CHOOOMANTAR...plays in background* Poof!  

S:
*the end*   [See iski jibh kabhi andar nahin rehti..no wonder she calls herself MissShaitaan...Actually she should call herself MissDumb]